Who Am I

30 Jun

Who am I, the song by Casting Crowns, comes into my mind this day. I have tried and failed at being a more faithful Christian. It is not a big deal, but I had wanted to soften my heart, look with God’s eyes, at a situation that was annoying me. I failed miserably. So, I take solace in the words of this Casting Crown song.

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done
But because of who You are

It is particularly the turn of phrase in these four lines that always goes straight to my heart. It is not because of who I am that I am loved and made whole by God, but because of the Divine works on my behalf. I am not able to change the fundamental nature of my life, but it is the nature of God the can change everything. God’s love for each of us it the power in the universe that gives us hope in each day.

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I’m calling
Lord, You catch me when I’m falling
And You’ve told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

I also like the reality check in the song that we exist in just a moment in time, a vapor in the wind. It is God who is – existing in all of time – continuing to be present to all of creation. And it is the same God who comes to us, to rescue us, and give us our name. We are God’s children.

I think I am no closer to being the open, loving, non-judging person God would want me to be, yet I can trust in God’s love to help me again and again and again as I try.

Praise God that the Divine does not give up on us! Peace.

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One Response to “Who Am I”

  1. Linda July 3, 2014 at 4:38 am #

    I love your honesty, Mary. I hope you can soften your heart, and look with God’s eyes, at your own human-ness! You’d probably tell the rest of us that being faithful isn’t about success or failure…. To quote another Casting Crowns song, “All You’ve ever wanted was my heart.”

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